The first time I did a therapy role-play, something about the process connected with a very deep part of me. I have always been a sensitive person, and empathy always came very naturally to me. I wanted to choose a profession where this sensitivity and empathy was an asset, not a liability. And one where I could use this to help alleviate the suffering of others.
Few things in life are as meaningful as the feeling of connecting to another human being and making them feel heard and less alone, helping them to experience a sense of hope about their future, as well as the shared experience of moving forward with them in their journeys.
A few things:
- Feeling a sense of rapport and connection (which will determine if we are a good fit to work together)
- Feeling that you were able to outline at least some of the key concerns you’ve come to therapy with (and that they have been understood by me),
- An outline of a plan for the road ahead (or at least the next few steps)
- A sense of relief and hope
By creating an intention to change something in your life and seeking out support, you’ve already begun the process of change! Not only that, you’ve taken one of the most difficult steps change entails!
To create a warm space of solace and comfort from the difficulties of the world. A place of understanding, not judgement, where clients can bring themselves as they are without having to needlessly self-edit and self-censor. But also one that energizes clients to take action on the things they want to change in their lives.
The indomitability of the human spirit! And people’s remarkable ability to put their lives back together if their therapist can just create the right conditions for them.
I have been fortunate to work with a very diverse range of individuals - be it with regards to their professional, socioeconomic & cultural backgrounds, their age groups, or various other aspects of their identities.
Also, because of the way my brain is wired, analogies and metaphors come very naturally to me. This is useful at different stages of therapy - from understanding client’s lived experiences, to creating an evocative framework for the actions we will take next together.
I like reading and learning far and wide, I like playing with my cat. I occasionally attempt to use music, writing and other creative endeavours as an outlet for self-expression, and I enjoy martial arts.
My approach varies depending on the person I’m working with and the concerns they want to work on. Therefore, I have an eclectic approach that melds various styles, techniques and approaches. I am not a proponent for having a singular, “one-size-fits-all” therapeutic approach.
At the core of my approach is the belief that each human has the latent potential within themselves to not only heal, but to flourish. I look at one of the key focuses of therapy to reconnect individuals to this part of themselves, by creating a space that is safe, non-judgemental, warm and reflective.
My approach at times tends to be a bit “non-directive”: I look at myself more as someone walking alongside you in this journey, as opposed to being the all-knowing expert all the time in our work together.
Despite being cis-gendered, I’ve always had questions about the idea of gender. I’ve found the strict rules about gender roles constricting. Many of the ways people perform their gender roles has always seemed odd to me, and the negative attitudes around different sexual orientations have always vexed me.
Because of this, I’ve always been curious about the many different experiences and perspectives of LGBTQ+ people and how these different aspects of identity intersect.
To learn more, I satisfy this curiosity mainly by connecting with queer and transgender individuals. This happens through talking with friends, colleagues, and other people, as well as through reading books, articles, blogs, and watching video essays.
To better understand my own biases and stay aware of them, I regularly participate in supervision as well as personal therapy.
Homo sum, humani nihil a me alienum puto (I am a human being, nothing human can be alien to me)
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