Irvin Yalom, a psychotherapist who I align with, talks about the therapist and the client being ‘fellow travelers’ in therapy. This means that the therapist too experiences the ups and downs of life, just like the client - they don’t have everything figured out either. This highlights the humanness of the therapist and also the humanness of the therapeutic relationship, making space for an authentic shared connection. This for me defines the relationship that I wish to build with clients. We’re fellow travelers, figuring it out as we go.

I also believe in taking a non-directive approach which allows the client to take control of how they would like to drive the therapy sessions. This is to make sure that their needs are always at the center.

I try and handle everything that comes up in the therapy space with a lot of sensitivity and care. I understand that this is an extremely vulnerable space where people might lay bare so many parts of them - even the ones that might be difficult for them to talk about. I try and create a safe space for each of these parts to show up.

At the same time, I also carry a lot of reflexivity into the sessions. I am aware that I too will make mistakes and will have my own blind spots as a therapist. And so I make sure to absorb feedback and reflect back.

I use an eclectic approach in therapy borrowing from different schools of thought. One of these is Internal Family Systems (IFS) which says that everyone has a lot of different ‘parts’ to who they are as individuals. Each part holds a purpose for us - even the ones we don’t like so much. This process allows space for building curiosity, compassion and understanding towards and between all of these parts.

Another approach is the object relations framework from the psychodynamic school - this explores how early childhood attachments impact later relationships in life with people and objects around us.

I have also trained in narrative therapy - It stems from the idea that we all hold a certain narrative about ourselves and sometimes these narratives make us feel like we are the problem. However, narrative therapy upholds the principle that ’the person is not the problem’ by locating the problem within the larger systemic context. It also helps in identifying the skills, strengths and values that the person associates with. This then helps in reshaping the narratives that we hold with a greater sense of agency.

I use expressive arts in my work with those clients where it seems like a fit and I locate all of these approaches within a trauma-informed framework.