Psychology and counselling weren’t something that came to me in a straightforward way. in his poem “The Road Not Taken,” Robert Frost talks about taking the road less travelled by. I initially did the opposite and took the road everyone seemed to travel, becoming an engineer because I wasn’t sure what I truly wanted. I struggled a lot at work because I wasn’t using anything that I was skilled in. I have always been a people-oriented person, getting energized by engaging in conversations, but that wasn’t part of my job description. So, I quit, took a career assessment, and was told to explore the social science field, and that is how I got into counselling. Studying psychology and delving into the intricacies of human connections never felt like a task; it felt natural and deeply satisfying. And while the journey might have had a few diversions along the way, I am happy to be in a profession where I can be my true and authentic self.
My clients. None of us are born with a handbook on how to navigate life, and my favorite part of counselling is understanding how each person has forged their own unique path. No matter how many clients | meet, each one brings their own distinct experiences and stories.
A sense of safety, understanding and not feeling judged. Many clients share that they’ve never spoken about their issues to anyone else because they feel misunderstood. One of my main goals in the first session is to show that the therapy space is a place where they can be completely themselves and speak their minds freely.
Check the qualifications of your therapist. Ensure they have at least a Masters in Psychology if they’re a Counselling Psychologist and an M.Phil from an RCI accredited institute if they’re a Clinical Psychologist.
Ask questions to any potential therapist. Ask them about their therapy process, if they have previous experience working with your concerns, their charges, their rescheduling and cancellation policies, etc. Have introductory calls with multiple therapists and choose one with whom you feel comfortable.
If at any point in time you don’t feel comfortable with your therapist, let them know. You have the right to discontinue with your therapist if you feel unheard or unsafe.
In my first session I talk to them about how therapy is their space where they can be as free and vulnerable as they want. We also talk about them having the choice to always let me know if they disagree with me or if I misunderstand what they’re saying. Before any goal-setting, homework, assessment, referral to other professionals, I always ask their input.
How they have navigated different challenges ad obstacles and persevered to reach where they are. Many have confronted significant setbacks, yet they’ve found ways to cope, learn, and transform their experiences into a source of strength.
Empathy and a non-judgmental stance will always be the two most valuable skills as a therapist. Those are my strengths, but I also understand that as a human, I might still make mistakes. So taking accountability for my actions is another skill and strength that is very important to me as a counsellor.
Watch a show (I love crime shows!), read, sing, spend time with family and friends. I also love going to the beach and listening to the waves.
I use a schema and attachment oriented framework, which means I focus on how a client’s childhood experiences, relationships, and attachments with primary figures (parents, siblings, caregivers) in their lives have shaped who they are today.
Ensuring a non-judgmental approach with every client. In my intake form I state my gender and pronouns and also give my clients the choice of them wanting to state theirs. My supervision spaces are queer affirmative. I also read up on queer experiences and queer affirmative therapy.
To be human is to need others, and that is no flaw or weakness.
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