The Gathering
Why We Gathered
This story is a labour of love, resistance, and hope that was made possible from a gathering that we held called the Alternative Identity Project. Over 4 rainy afternoons in July 2019, we had invited 8 young people with diverse identities to come together and engage in conversations about failure. Failure is a feeling that often seeps into us when we do not fit into accepted norms of how we should and should not be in this world. Our endeavour with the gathering was to reject the idea of personal failure and instead place failure in the unequal systems and unjust structures around us that perpetuate these norms.
This was not a space for teaching people how to overcome failure or learning how to “fit in”. This was a space for questioning what failure means and who gets to decide that. It was a space to collectively take a second look at norms that inform us of the kind of people we should be and the lives we should live, instead of accepting them as a taken-for-granted truth. To identify the cracks in these norms where people’s voices of resistance can seep in, and to shine a light on their alternative knowledges and ways of living, bringing them out of the shadows of failure.
Holding a Collective Stance
In order to call out problems that are as big as systems of power such as heteronormativity, ableism, casteism, patriarchy, capitalism, and the like, I imagine it takes a clear and firm belief in and commitment to the stance that the problem lies in the norms and rules championed by these systems; it does not lie within people. With this in mind, we decided to invite young people who experience marginalization related to their identities of gender, sexuality, religion, caste, and disability, and who hold some belief in the idea of rejecting personal failure and questioning systems of power. This collective stance of protesting dominant discourses of personal failure and choosing to thicken each young person’s story and history of resistance to the way norms influenced their life, contributed immensely to this experience.
We used mediums such as small group discussions, large group conversations to encourage critical thinking, art, games, and letter writing to bring these ideas to life.
This is the story of these 8 young people, their journey of finding each other, making visible their acts of refusal and resistance against failure, and reimagining a preferred world that places failure in unequal and incomplete norms, not in people. A world that invites inclusion of all identities, respect for contexts, agency for people, and community care.
A Letter to Our Readers
Dear Reader,
If our lives were a landscape, what would be the same and what would be different?
Would you and I share the same mountains?
Would you and I share the same mountains?
Would our rivers flow differently?
Would we look up to see the same sky?
Would we witness the clouds differently?
Would the air smell the same?
Would our feet feel the earth differently?
If our lives were a landscape, what would be the same and what would be different?
As you delve into this story, consider this an invitation to explore the diversity of human experiences. To sit with any emotions that come up and to approach these stories with an open heart and mind.
You may find that the characters you meet are grappling with challenges in a world that might be different from yours. Alternatively, you may find parts of yourself reflected in these stories, wherein you feel a connection to the character. It’s important to recognize that not everyone shares the same experiences, and at the same time, many of the emotions reflected in these stories can be universal.
The stories of their lives and experiences are theirs to tell, not mine. What I’m hoping to do with Finding Our Forest is to only tell the tale of how these 8 young people met each other, how they connected through their hopes and dreams, how they challenge the dominant discourse around failure every day, and what supports them to continue resisting, living, and thriving.
The characters you will encounter are individuals navigating complex intersections of identity, pushing back against norms in our society that are not inclusive of many aspects of their realities. Anger, resistance, tears, are a natural response here. They are not signs of defeat but expressions of strength and a sign of protest against unjust norms. Expressions of joy, care, rest, friendship, and community are also part of their responses. It’s a potent reminder that each of us contains multitudes of emotions and ways of being that can co-exist with each other.
As you engage with this story, I hope for you to notice how it can be a window into a broader dialogue about inclusion, identity, and systemic challenges.
I hope you allow yourself to sit with the comfort, the tension, and everything in between. I hope that every time you visit the story, you take away something different each time.
In excitement and hope,
Shweta
A note of gratitude and remembering
My heartfelt gratitude goes to the 8 young people who were a big part of the gathering and the conversations that helped create this story.
Hritnay, Babli, Jai, Kavya, Rohan, Rahim, Sneha, Pranali
This story is yours. Thank you for existing, resisting, persisting and teaching me to never stop holding on to hope. I think of you every day.
To my colleague and confidant, Yashna.
Thank you for co-facilitating the gathering with me, holding space for my ‘what ifs’, and having my back on this journey every step of the way. It was your belief in our work, your kindness, and your brilliance that shaped this endeavour in the most beautiful ways.
To my preferred mentors, Raviraj and Jehanzeb.
Your guidance, confidence, and support influenced me to keep believing in the magic of this work.
To our illustrator, Jaya.
This story’s essence has come alive because of the beautiful work you have offered us. Thank you for capturing our ideas, the nuances and experiences of the young participants through this story in the most wholesome, relatable, and heart-warming way.
To Radhika and Vijay.
Thank you for being my co-travelers in this journey in the truest sense of the term. Your willingness to be my accountability buddies, to keep me grounded and hopeful, and to help me approach this work with playfulness, intention, flexibility, care, and compassion has been central to my engagement with it.
To Neeraj.
For your labour, patience, and support in translating the participants’ letters to the world.
To my partner, Mani.
This story would not have seen the light of day without you. You’ve supported me in navigating my multiple anxieties around this story, shared your feedback with the utmost kindness, and gently nudged me to keep going with the process especially when I was losing steam. Thank you for teaching me to have faith. For all of this and so much more, I will always be grateful.
Continue the journey